emotions

Just because I am having a sad day does not mean I am not a happy person…

I believe for the past months I thought that I had so many people to answer for my feelings that I would almost stop myself from feeling certain emotions so they would not criticize me or ask me why I feel a particular emotion if I made others “perceive that I am happy”.

This attitude made me feel as though I was back into my little dark hole from high school every time I felt any sort of negative emotion.

         Whether it be anger

                            Sadness

                                     Jealousy

                                               Fatigue

For everything I felt I first justified to myself why it was okay to feel those things before letting myself express them, too afraid that if I were not able to answer an analyzer of my life that I would be classified as suffering with “depression” all over again or that “the experiences in my life were not leading me to have a happy life”.

Too afraid that if I said I was feeling off people would start pointing fingers at everything I held dear most in my life and blaming it for how I was feeling in that moment.

As someone who was a big believer in having to feel all of our emotions even the negative ones I bottled a lot up over the past two years because I was afraid of how my surroundings would interpret them.

After a few years I have finally gained my independence again and although at times I miss having people evaluate my life with me I believe my mind works best alone. With the people in my life and the new ones who may enter I have a strong enough foot hold on the ground to not let them shift my focus.

No one can go through life without feeling anything negative.

So don’t blame yourself or anything you love on your negative emotions.

Emotions are to be felt and as humans we cannot live without feeling all their potentials including all that can be negative.

It is how we handle it that shows our personality.

And we cannot handle it if we don’t face it.